Wednesday, September 28, 2005


Do you know how it feels to find out that your Dad's girlfriend doesn't know you exist, to feel that you weren't worth one minute in their conversation, but to know that next time you see him he'll put you on a pedestall? Do you know how it feels to be told that you're loved, and be unable to believe it? Do you know what it feels like to be so close to someone but to feel there's a million miles between you? Do you know how much of a relief it is sometimes, to just cry? Do you know how it feels to feel nothing, to not know how you feel, to need to feel something?

I just watched Crazy Beautiful. It made me cry, for a lot of it actually. It might be a truly crap film but I didn't feel much before it and it just hit me. It's gone midnight and I've done none of my homework, all of it for tomorrow, none of it will get done.

I did go to school today, but I couldn't stick it. So now I'm at home. Anyway I'm fine, I'll be fine.

Hope everyone's ok. x x x


Davus said...

i know how it feels to feel close to someone but also have them be a million (well, 250 or so) miles away. it's not nice. i hope you feel better soon, talk to you on msn.

Nodders said...

Oh Niki, you poor thing. No, I don't know what you must be feeling, but you know we're all here to talk to xxx

Stagestruckgal said...

oh no! Im sorry, i dont know how you will be feeling right now, but i hope you feel better soon!! and yes, cry away, its a good thing. let all that stress etc flow out with the tears. oh dear, now i sound like a psychiatrist! sorry. xx

Davus said...

i've changed address, i'm now
look forward to your comments, they are always much appreciated.

Niki said...

thanks guys x x x