Saturday, February 19, 2011

Our little trip down south went very well. Alfie's great-grandparents absolutely adored him and it was lovely for me to see them again too. We spent some time at their house and some time in Southampton too, just a little wander around West Quay and IKEA - of course. We drove back to Doncaster laden with books of mine and gifts for Alfie and when we arrived home I tidied it all away into new homes.

Tonight Will is out at a school reunion so it's just me and Alfie, we've had a little fun and he's had some milk and is now out for the count - until he gets hungry again of course!

Before Alfie arrived I always felt that I had failed. Yes I had a wonderful man to fall in love with, but also I had scars, crap A-Levels and no degree. I felt jealous of all my friends still living the student life, gaining qualifications and life experience and basically doing everything that my illness made me give up.

But now, now I have Alfie I feel like I have a purpose. Before I lived for William but now I live for Alfie too, and through the love that the three of us share I have started to live for myself. I buy myself (too many) new clothes, I had my hair styled and I'm making the effort to start - and stick to - a new diet.

What I think I'm trying to say is that you don't always have to get it right first time. I will always have scars, and probably always take medication - but I won't always live in the past. There is such a thing as a second chance, and if you realise it in time then you can make it work - no matter what's happened before.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Well, my 'little' boy is 12lb12oz at 8 weeks old. In fact he's 8 weeks old today and doing fabulously.

Tomorrow we are taking a little journey down South to see my grandparents, and to show off the little man. It'll be our first trip away as a family so we are excited! We've bought sandwich-making ingredients and lots of bottles are ready to be sterilised. It turns out that babies need a lot of things!

Hope you're all well.

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

Hello everyone

My little boy is 7 weeks old today and I'm sorry to say that rather than spending the day celebrating we took delivery of a new couch and went on a mission to IKEA. We needed some drawers for the bedroom and also picked up some shelves and little bits and bobs. Bargain of the day was 36 scented tealights for 50p, courtesy of the 'Bargain Corner'.

Each day I wake up and I am happy. I know that no matter how stressed I may get when he cries, or how many times he pees on my trousers I still have a perfect little boy to love and to care for. I love him with all my heart and could never have imagined this level of love without him. AND as an added bonus I have a bigger boy whom I also love with all my heart - sometimes I even get to care for him too!