Sunday, January 30, 2011

A few days ago I drove myself to the doctors for the very first time. I have never driven our new car on my own and I felt so good about it that as soon as I got home, I went out again to pick up my prescription! The best part of it all was that William said he was proud of me. I'm still buzzing from that.

Today baby and I went into town on our own as William went out to play paintball with some friends for the day. We caught the bus and had a good look around, baby was as good as gold and again I felt like my confidence is getting better and better. I was worried that I couldn't cope on my own but now I know I can it really makes me feel stronger.

Finally my life seems to have a point. I not only have a loving fiance whom I will love forever and a day, but a beautiful baby boy who is mine to treasure and love.


Gledwood said...

That's fantastic. I lost all my confidence due to depression that was worse than I thought it was at the time. When a dr said "psychotic features" I kind of thought "you're having a laugh" but I look back and realize he was right. I only look back like that due to having to give an entire psychiatic history in 45 minutes at an emeregency assessment about a week and a half ago. I'm on antipsychotics too. Antidepressants make me go off like a firecracker. Mood stabilizers at the moment no. I don't even have a proper diagnosis (too early, even though I'm 38).

Sorry to make this about me when I came to talk about you. I've been following your blog for a while and it's v interesting.

Re: the meds situation ~ having a baby, that must have been a bit ticky... no? (Re the meds...)

Nikita said...

Hi Gledwood, thanks for stopping by and leaving me a comment.
Which antipsychotics are you taking? Are they helping you? I really seem to be doing well on mine and certainly a lot better than my previous medication - quetiapine.
Sorry to hear you don't have a diagnosis yet, I know how frustrating that can be. In a way I'm lucky to have a diagnosis, medication and a support system at only 21.
There was a lot of speculation from a lot of doctors about whether the risks to baby were outweighed by the potential for making me relapse if I was taken off them. In the end they decided it would be better for me to stay well on them and instead they monitored me very closely both before and after the birth. I'm pleased to report that little one seems to have been unaffected, thankfully.
Thanks again for popping by, hope to see you again soon.