Thursday, April 23, 2009

Dawning

It just dawned on me watching Hollyoaks.

Maybe when I got out of hospital and Mum learnt of my struggles and self harm, maybe she was scared. Maybe she couldn't understand how I could do it to myself.

I don't really know of course.... but lately I am learning that things aren't always what they seem. I have no idea what my Mum thought/thinks but perhaps it wasn't how I envisaged.

I think that's what 'mental illness' is... pain. We dress it up and tone it down. But at the end of the day, it's painful and it causes pain.

Everyday pain surfaces... maybe that's not mental illness, just life.

7 comments:

much2ponder said...

Read you last post and now this one, sorry I have not been in touch much. Life gets too crazy and the computer is the first thing to get squeezed out. Your words have me thinking and pondering on some things. Hope you are well. Keeping you in my prayers tonight.

Rainbow dreams said...

honest truth, if one of my children was in that position, I'd be scared...
noone can ever know how someone else feels unless they say and sometimes it's just hard to know and even harder to articulate.. words are so limiting at times.

Nikita said...

Ah thanks for popping by Patricia... not to worry, I read blogs all the time but am finding it hard to get comments out also. Thank you.

They are Katie, this is one I have to think on I guess.

Rainbow dreams said...

Hey congratulations, xxx :)

Nikita said...

:) thank you xxx

Thomas said...

Way to go!

P.S. - Hey, how about a link back to my site. http://www.tomslatin.com/ :)

Nikita said...

Thanks Thomas. Yes! I have had a link to yours before, but it always fails on me. Will try again!
x